The whole balance theory has really been staying with me.
There is a certain pop star that died about a year ago. I'm not naming names out of respect for the deceased. This pop star had been accused of committing several sexual offenses against children. At the time of his death, I heard a significant amount of talk in the media and on street level to this effect;
'We shouldn't judge him for the things that he has done. We should remember him for his music and his contribution to our culture'
To be honest, I don't know for sure if the allegations were true. I'm not really speaking about what really went on. I'm speaking on how we as a people come to terms with having a 'balance' between good and evil in our lives
Am I alone? I mean, when a priest or pastor has sexual charges laid against them, I don't hear the same kind of commentary, either in the news or at work. Do you ever hear, 'Well at least he helped a lot of people.'?
I guess it's ok to molest children as long as you make really cool music videos.
Wrong is wrong and it doesn't matter if you are a rock star, truck driver or pastor.
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Saturday, July 17, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Yin and Yang
There is more to God’s standard for human sexuality, but this should be a decent start. Suppose you haven’t come to Christ yet, how do you respond to the law? Have you done any of these?
(See last post.)
As for me, I have. Please don’t ask me to tell you which one(s) I’ve violated. I hope that it is sufficient for me to be honest enough in saying that I have violated one (or more) of these laws found in Leviticus 18. Would you like a number? If I said, “Three”, would you look through the list again wondering which three I have broken? The law was intended to reveal our sin and to point us to Christ, but that isn’t how everyone responds.
The easy route is to tell ourselves that this God is little more than a spooky fairy tale. However, I’m convinced that for anyone who is honest with their conscience, that this doesn’t really seem to settle one’s heart. Many or most atheists seem to spend much of their lives fighting against a God they claim doesn’t exist. That's Wierd.
http://kevinabell.blogspot.com/2010/05/what-lies-beneath-part-iii.html
The good old fashioned ‘balance’ theory is a good one too. It’s okay for me to do things that are vile, as long as I do enough good things to counteract the bad. How does that really work in real life? Suppose someone kills your son, but they do a lot of charitable work. Would that wash with you? If I beat my wife and children, but I help at a soup kitchen on weekends, does that really make it all better? To me, that kind of thinking is just dumb. Sorry if you disagree with me, but I can’t yield on this one. Even if it did work, how do you know what the score is?
There is a place for balance in life. It’s not good for me to spend every waking hour at work. It isn’t good to choose not to work so that I can live an impoverished life and stay at home with my family. I shouldn’t spend all of my evening hours out with the guys. We do need to balance work and family life. What I’m saying, is that as far as good and evil are concerned, embracing evil isn’t right, even if we do give to the food bank.
Doing nice stuff doesn’t erase the evil we have done in this life. If we see our sin as sin and if we are honest with ourselves, no Boy Scout good deed actually erases it.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Killjoy.....
Leviticus 18
Forbidden Sexual Practices
1 Then the Lord said to Moses, 2 “Give the following instructions to the people of Israel. I am the Lord your God. 3 So do not act like the people in Egypt, where you used to live, or like the people of Canaan, where I am taking you. You must not imitate their way of life.
Remember...People were actually doing these things. Nothing is new.
4 You must obey all my regulations and be careful to obey my decrees, for I am the Lord your God. 5 If you obey my decrees and my regulations, you will find life through them. I am the Lord.
6 “You must never have sexual relations with a close relative, for I am the Lord.
I suppose verse 6 wasn't clear enough, because he had to elaborate further......
7 “Do not violate your father by having sexual relations with your mother. She is your mother; you must not have sexual relations with her.
8 “Do not have sexual relations with any of your father’s wives, for this would violate your father.
9 “Do not have sexual relations with your sister or half sister, whether she is your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born into your household or someone else’s.
10 “Do not have sexual relations with your granddaughter, whether she is your son’s daughter or your daughter’s daughter, for this would violate yourself.
11 “Do not have sexual relations with your stepsister, the daughter of any of your father’s wives, for she is your sister.
12 “Do not have sexual relations with your father’s sister, for she is your father’s close relative.
13 “Do not have sexual relations with your mother’s sister, for she is your mother’s close relative.
14 “Do not violate your uncle, your father’s brother, by having sexual relations with his wife, for she is your aunt.
15 “Do not have sexual relations with your daughter-in-law; she is your son’s wife, so you must not have sexual relations with her.
16 “Do not have sexual relations with your brother’s wife, for this would violate your brother.
17 “Do not have sexual relations with both a woman and her daughter. And do not take[a] her granddaughter, whether her son’s daughter or her daughter’s daughter, and have sexual relations with her. They are close relatives, and this would be a wicked act.
18 “While your wife is living, do not marry her sister and have sexual relations with her, for they would be rivals.
Now that God has covered most of the specific family relationships, it's time to get to some particulars.....
19 “Do not have sexual relations with a woman during her period of menstrual impurity.
20 “Do not defile yourself by having sexual intercourse with your neighbor’s wife.
21 “Do not permit any of your children to be offered as a sacrifice to Molech, for you must not bring shame on the name of your God. I am the Lord.
Ok. Don't kill my kids. Got it.
22 “Do not practice homosexuality, having sex with another man as with a woman. It is a detestable sin.
You mean there were people who did that back then? It isn't new?
23 “A man must not defile himself by having sex with an animal. And a woman must not offer herself to a male animal to have intercourse with it. This is a perverse act.
Animals are off limits too?
24 “Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, for the people I am driving out before you have defiled themselves in all these ways.
I left verse 24 in there for you just so we all know that any kind of deviant sexual behaviour in our day really isn't a new concept. The people living in Canaan had been doing these things. There you have it folks. This is one part of the law that we still need to take serious. There is more, but this chapter summarizes much of the dirty specifics.
Remember, the law has its purpose - to tell us what sin is and to point us to Christ. Any objections before I move on?
Forbidden Sexual Practices
1 Then the Lord said to Moses, 2 “Give the following instructions to the people of Israel. I am the Lord your God. 3 So do not act like the people in Egypt, where you used to live, or like the people of Canaan, where I am taking you. You must not imitate their way of life.
Remember...People were actually doing these things. Nothing is new.
4 You must obey all my regulations and be careful to obey my decrees, for I am the Lord your God. 5 If you obey my decrees and my regulations, you will find life through them. I am the Lord.
6 “You must never have sexual relations with a close relative, for I am the Lord.
I suppose verse 6 wasn't clear enough, because he had to elaborate further......
7 “Do not violate your father by having sexual relations with your mother. She is your mother; you must not have sexual relations with her.
8 “Do not have sexual relations with any of your father’s wives, for this would violate your father.
9 “Do not have sexual relations with your sister or half sister, whether she is your father’s daughter or your mother’s daughter, whether she was born into your household or someone else’s.
10 “Do not have sexual relations with your granddaughter, whether she is your son’s daughter or your daughter’s daughter, for this would violate yourself.
11 “Do not have sexual relations with your stepsister, the daughter of any of your father’s wives, for she is your sister.
12 “Do not have sexual relations with your father’s sister, for she is your father’s close relative.
13 “Do not have sexual relations with your mother’s sister, for she is your mother’s close relative.
14 “Do not violate your uncle, your father’s brother, by having sexual relations with his wife, for she is your aunt.
15 “Do not have sexual relations with your daughter-in-law; she is your son’s wife, so you must not have sexual relations with her.
16 “Do not have sexual relations with your brother’s wife, for this would violate your brother.
17 “Do not have sexual relations with both a woman and her daughter. And do not take[a] her granddaughter, whether her son’s daughter or her daughter’s daughter, and have sexual relations with her. They are close relatives, and this would be a wicked act.
18 “While your wife is living, do not marry her sister and have sexual relations with her, for they would be rivals.
Now that God has covered most of the specific family relationships, it's time to get to some particulars.....
19 “Do not have sexual relations with a woman during her period of menstrual impurity.
20 “Do not defile yourself by having sexual intercourse with your neighbor’s wife.
21 “Do not permit any of your children to be offered as a sacrifice to Molech, for you must not bring shame on the name of your God. I am the Lord.
Ok. Don't kill my kids. Got it.
22 “Do not practice homosexuality, having sex with another man as with a woman. It is a detestable sin.
You mean there were people who did that back then? It isn't new?
23 “A man must not defile himself by having sex with an animal. And a woman must not offer herself to a male animal to have intercourse with it. This is a perverse act.
Animals are off limits too?
24 “Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, for the people I am driving out before you have defiled themselves in all these ways.
I left verse 24 in there for you just so we all know that any kind of deviant sexual behaviour in our day really isn't a new concept. The people living in Canaan had been doing these things. There you have it folks. This is one part of the law that we still need to take serious. There is more, but this chapter summarizes much of the dirty specifics.
Remember, the law has its purpose - to tell us what sin is and to point us to Christ. Any objections before I move on?
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Got Purity?
Well, I went, I talked and I walked out alive. I guess all went well enough. No decision cards were handed in so depending on your flavour of the faith, maybe you wouldn’t call Saturday night a success.
Having had a wonderful evening with the believers at Aylmer’s Evengelical Mennonite Church, my thoughts return here to cyberspace and back to working through ‘The Law’ in the life of a believer. I hope this isn’t being drawn out too long, but I feel led to linger here for a while. I really don’t see a need to talk about eating strangled animals, drinking blood or eating food which has knowingly been offered to an idol. The sexual sin thing remains with me though.
I mean, since it is named among the 4 non-negotiables for a follower of Christ and since we’re told that no other sin so clearly affects the body as this one, I believe it deserves a little more thought, time and study.
Before I continue however, I want to set up the playing field. I want to make sure that this is a fair game where everybody gets to participate. So I’m asking for your input. Here is the question at hand....
Have any of you lived lives that are completely sexually pure?
I’m taking Jesus’ standard here. In other words, you have never lusted after someone who is not married to you. You have never had sexual intercourse out of marriage. You have never flipped through a nudy book. You are completely clean with regards to God’s standards for human sexuality. Can any of us claim that?
I ask this question in order to make sure the playing field really is level. So often, when church people like me talk about sexual sin, we’re accused of demonizing one particular group or another. Many of us don’t mind acknowledging that we are sinners in a general sense. However, when it comes down to specifics where our sin is labelled as it is, our human nature tends to be both offensive and offended.
So – in my next post, if I speak on a few particulars of God’s sexual standards, don’t get all offended unless there is such a thing as being completely without fault before God in this area. If we really are sinners then it should be no surprise to find out that we have actually sinned.
If on the other hand you believe yourself to be above reproach and are completely self righteous, then I probably will offend you. In that case, please don’t bother reading my next post on this issue.
Having had a wonderful evening with the believers at Aylmer’s Evengelical Mennonite Church, my thoughts return here to cyberspace and back to working through ‘The Law’ in the life of a believer. I hope this isn’t being drawn out too long, but I feel led to linger here for a while. I really don’t see a need to talk about eating strangled animals, drinking blood or eating food which has knowingly been offered to an idol. The sexual sin thing remains with me though.
I mean, since it is named among the 4 non-negotiables for a follower of Christ and since we’re told that no other sin so clearly affects the body as this one, I believe it deserves a little more thought, time and study.
Before I continue however, I want to set up the playing field. I want to make sure that this is a fair game where everybody gets to participate. So I’m asking for your input. Here is the question at hand....
Have any of you lived lives that are completely sexually pure?
I’m taking Jesus’ standard here. In other words, you have never lusted after someone who is not married to you. You have never had sexual intercourse out of marriage. You have never flipped through a nudy book. You are completely clean with regards to God’s standards for human sexuality. Can any of us claim that?
I ask this question in order to make sure the playing field really is level. So often, when church people like me talk about sexual sin, we’re accused of demonizing one particular group or another. Many of us don’t mind acknowledging that we are sinners in a general sense. However, when it comes down to specifics where our sin is labelled as it is, our human nature tends to be both offensive and offended.
So – in my next post, if I speak on a few particulars of God’s sexual standards, don’t get all offended unless there is such a thing as being completely without fault before God in this area. If we really are sinners then it should be no surprise to find out that we have actually sinned.
If on the other hand you believe yourself to be above reproach and are completely self righteous, then I probably will offend you. In that case, please don’t bother reading my next post on this issue.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Abell Sportsnet.
Going into the final week of soccer this summer, here are the standings;
Win Loss Tie
My Daughter's Team: Peloquin Promotions 2 - 7 - 1
The Twins: Aylmer Kinsmen 6 - 1 - 3
Jeremy's Team :Brown Timbits 3 - 7 - 0
Nathaniel 2 goal and 3 assists so far this season
Jeremy - 16 goals so far this season and one assist.
With one game left to go in the season, Matthew and Nathaniel's team suffered their first loss. They are in first place by 2 points. So it comes down to one game. If they win and the second place teams wins....my boy's won't have the red ribbons.
It's been fun, but I'll be thankful to get back to living a boring life.
Win Loss Tie
My Daughter's Team: Peloquin Promotions 2 - 7 - 1
The Twins: Aylmer Kinsmen 6 - 1 - 3
Jeremy's Team :Brown Timbits 3 - 7 - 0
Nathaniel 2 goal and 3 assists so far this season
Jeremy - 16 goals so far this season and one assist.
With one game left to go in the season, Matthew and Nathaniel's team suffered their first loss. They are in first place by 2 points. So it comes down to one game. If they win and the second place teams wins....my boy's won't have the red ribbons.
It's been fun, but I'll be thankful to get back to living a boring life.
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Busy
If I don't have any new posts in the next week, it's because I'm putting the bulk of my time into preparing to speak next Saturday. I had my message 'all planned out', until my friend Michael asked me some questions. How dare he?
If you have the time and are interested, I'll be speaking at the Aylmer Evangelical Mennonite Church across from Summers Corners on July 10th. I think it's around 6:30. Like I said, I'm rethinking a lot of it so I have not idea what it will be about. It could be good. It could be really bad. Time will tell.
Love Kevin
If you have the time and are interested, I'll be speaking at the Aylmer Evangelical Mennonite Church across from Summers Corners on July 10th. I think it's around 6:30. Like I said, I'm rethinking a lot of it so I have not idea what it will be about. It could be good. It could be really bad. Time will tell.
Love Kevin
XXX
“HeyKev! Did you hear that they managed to stop the well in the gulf from spewing oil?”
“Really?” I asked.
Immediately my boss replied, “Yeah. They put a wedding ring around it and it stopped pumping right away.”
I smiled and put on a timid chuckle, even though I hadn’t really found it to be all that humorous. It was a joke which was told to him by one of the guys from St. Thomas Ford. It was a joke that many people found to be rather hilarious. I’m thinking that it’s funny to a lot of people, because behind that joke lies a certain truth for those who enjoy the jest.
I am led to believe, that for many couples, the wedding ring does reduce the pumping. I say that because of the many jokes that I hear to that effect. Other conversations come to mind as well. I remember past coworkers saying, “Once I put that wedding ring on her finger, the door slammed shut.” In popular culture I have watched sitcom episodes where the romance dries up. Last year while in Niagara Falls with my family I remember seeing this young man wearing a red T-Shirt. On his shirt were a picture of a bride and a groom, holding hands. Under their picture read this caption, “Game Over!”
I have done a lot of things wrong in my life, so don’t allow this to lead you to believe me any better than I am. For me however, my experience has been quite different. Although far from perfection, when Barb and I put on our respective rings, that’s when our lives of intimacy began. Among my many regrets in life, waiting for each other isn’t among them.
Wondering if my experience in unique, I have asked a couple of godly men in my life if their experience has been the same. Tuesday evening I asked one in particular and his experience has been much like my own. “Kevin. It’s funny. Even after 14 years, you continue to learn new things about each other.” That’s when I cut him off. I really didn’t want him to elaborate. I really don't want to know what kind of 'new things' he's been learning in bed. As I am certain that you don’t want me to elaborate either.
I wonder if this is part of the reason why marriage in the heterosexual realm is viewed as being little more than a piece of paper. For many, marriage is the end of the story. In fact, is that not how many story books find their conclusion? ‘And they lived happily ever after’. Nothing important happens after that. The story is over. The game is over. The glory days are behind you. You have nothing left to do but to drink yourself silly, mourning on how your best days are left behind you in college or in high school. Your life is over, and the best that you can do is to raise kids, coach their soccer team and hope that they can grasp the life that you have left behind.
If you are a young couple who is getting married, or has just tied that knot, I want you to know that everything you’ve went through has been to prepare you for the life that you will forge as one. The life that you live together will determine the legacy that you leave behind. As I have said before; This isn’t game over, it’s game on. Your story book is just beginning; Opening with the words, “I do.”
For those of you who are single, I know it’s a meat grinder out there. I really wouldn’t want to be in your shoes these days. I know it’s tough and you might be tempted to think of giving up on striving for any kind of sexual purity. I want to remind you, that living like the world really isn’t all that glamorous. For many (not all), the well does stop pumping once the ring is slipped on. I’ve never promised you an easy road, in fact, it is supposed to be narrow and it is supposed to be tough. I pray that you are tough enough and patient enough to endure.
For those of you who are married, I hope that you have found it to be one of the most rewarding relationships in your life, second only to your relationship with the Saviour. If it isn’t, I want you to know that there is a way to overcome your past, and I’m certain that it can only be found through Jesus Himself. I am thinking of one of you in particular and even though your mistakes have carried their issues into your married life, you seem to be discovering how He really can erase the sins of your past when you recognize them and allow His power to have His way. I am so happy for you and your husband and the new life that you are forging together once more.
Sexual sin is a serious thing. Serious enough that God used to have people killed for it. We don’t kill fornicators or adulterers anymore, but if we have no intention of dealing with the sexual immorality in our lives, we don’t belong in the church. You might as well drink blood. I like the way Paul put it to the people in Corinth, “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” 1Corinthians 6:18
Run! When I think of those of you who are married, one of my greatest hopes is that you would be faithful to each other. I like when our families get together as families. If there are situations in your life that draw you away from your spouse, run away. Run as if it were a snake or something scurrying under the cupboard. Run to Jesus and run to the one who shares your bed.
If I could summarize my hope for those who are married, it would be this;
“Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts satisfy you always.
May you always be captivated by her love.” Proverbs 5:18-19
“Really?” I asked.
Immediately my boss replied, “Yeah. They put a wedding ring around it and it stopped pumping right away.”
I smiled and put on a timid chuckle, even though I hadn’t really found it to be all that humorous. It was a joke which was told to him by one of the guys from St. Thomas Ford. It was a joke that many people found to be rather hilarious. I’m thinking that it’s funny to a lot of people, because behind that joke lies a certain truth for those who enjoy the jest.
I am led to believe, that for many couples, the wedding ring does reduce the pumping. I say that because of the many jokes that I hear to that effect. Other conversations come to mind as well. I remember past coworkers saying, “Once I put that wedding ring on her finger, the door slammed shut.” In popular culture I have watched sitcom episodes where the romance dries up. Last year while in Niagara Falls with my family I remember seeing this young man wearing a red T-Shirt. On his shirt were a picture of a bride and a groom, holding hands. Under their picture read this caption, “Game Over!”
I have done a lot of things wrong in my life, so don’t allow this to lead you to believe me any better than I am. For me however, my experience has been quite different. Although far from perfection, when Barb and I put on our respective rings, that’s when our lives of intimacy began. Among my many regrets in life, waiting for each other isn’t among them.
Wondering if my experience in unique, I have asked a couple of godly men in my life if their experience has been the same. Tuesday evening I asked one in particular and his experience has been much like my own. “Kevin. It’s funny. Even after 14 years, you continue to learn new things about each other.” That’s when I cut him off. I really didn’t want him to elaborate. I really don't want to know what kind of 'new things' he's been learning in bed. As I am certain that you don’t want me to elaborate either.
I wonder if this is part of the reason why marriage in the heterosexual realm is viewed as being little more than a piece of paper. For many, marriage is the end of the story. In fact, is that not how many story books find their conclusion? ‘And they lived happily ever after’. Nothing important happens after that. The story is over. The game is over. The glory days are behind you. You have nothing left to do but to drink yourself silly, mourning on how your best days are left behind you in college or in high school. Your life is over, and the best that you can do is to raise kids, coach their soccer team and hope that they can grasp the life that you have left behind.
If you are a young couple who is getting married, or has just tied that knot, I want you to know that everything you’ve went through has been to prepare you for the life that you will forge as one. The life that you live together will determine the legacy that you leave behind. As I have said before; This isn’t game over, it’s game on. Your story book is just beginning; Opening with the words, “I do.”
For those of you who are single, I know it’s a meat grinder out there. I really wouldn’t want to be in your shoes these days. I know it’s tough and you might be tempted to think of giving up on striving for any kind of sexual purity. I want to remind you, that living like the world really isn’t all that glamorous. For many (not all), the well does stop pumping once the ring is slipped on. I’ve never promised you an easy road, in fact, it is supposed to be narrow and it is supposed to be tough. I pray that you are tough enough and patient enough to endure.
For those of you who are married, I hope that you have found it to be one of the most rewarding relationships in your life, second only to your relationship with the Saviour. If it isn’t, I want you to know that there is a way to overcome your past, and I’m certain that it can only be found through Jesus Himself. I am thinking of one of you in particular and even though your mistakes have carried their issues into your married life, you seem to be discovering how He really can erase the sins of your past when you recognize them and allow His power to have His way. I am so happy for you and your husband and the new life that you are forging together once more.
Sexual sin is a serious thing. Serious enough that God used to have people killed for it. We don’t kill fornicators or adulterers anymore, but if we have no intention of dealing with the sexual immorality in our lives, we don’t belong in the church. You might as well drink blood. I like the way Paul put it to the people in Corinth, “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” 1Corinthians 6:18
Run! When I think of those of you who are married, one of my greatest hopes is that you would be faithful to each other. I like when our families get together as families. If there are situations in your life that draw you away from your spouse, run away. Run as if it were a snake or something scurrying under the cupboard. Run to Jesus and run to the one who shares your bed.
If I could summarize my hope for those who are married, it would be this;
“Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you.
Rejoice in the wife of your youth.
She is a loving deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts satisfy you always.
May you always be captivated by her love.” Proverbs 5:18-19
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