Dear Pat;

I’ve had a few letters for Sonny and Sher on their upcoming marriage, but I want you to know how I often think of you as well. It often seems, especially in Christian circles that the natural process in life is to go to school, graduate, find a career and get married. I don’t know if you ever see it this way, but it often seems as if there is a stigma surrounding singlehood. It’s almost as if you fail to find that certain someone, that you have missed out on life and you have obviously made God mad and He’s cursing you by keeping you all alone.

It should have turned out differently. In high school, life seemed like an open book. Didn’t it? We’d finish school, walk into a fulfilling career and live hapily ever after. Something strange happens however for many of us. Doesn’t it? We wake up finding ourselfves in a job that doesn’t seem all that rewarding, having no one to share life with.

I suppose that I am tackling two issues at once, and maybe I shouldn’t do that. It’s bad form isn’t it? But still…I was watching my daughter and her soccer team this evening. I was wondering if those kids knew that a great number of them would end up working in a factory, pushing paper in some office, driving truck or stocking shelves at the grocery store. If they knew how dismal life can be, would they continue to run so happily up and down the field?

I talk to many people who feel as if they haven’t accomplished anything in life; people who are alone both within and without married life. Is it possible to live a fulfilling life if all of this world’s apparent parameters for happines remain just beyond our reach?

There are some things about life that I would like you to know, whether you would actually believe them or not. I want you to know that it is in fact good to live a celibate life. Those are not my words, but the words of Paul to the church in Corinth in 1Cor 7:1 Paul didn’t say that it was fun or rewarding to be without a wife or a husband. Rather, he said that celebacy is good. I’m saying this just in case you’re are thinking that your situation is some kind of curse from God. In fact, Paul goes on to say that the person who remains single does better in The Lord than the person who marries. 1Cor 7:38. Better? Better??!!! Yeah. Better. The life you are living isn't some curse. It was meant to be and has the potential to be glorious, if you are able to both recognize and embrace it.

I suppose if you really don’t want to live in fellowship with Him, those words ring hollow. Don’t they? But, what if? What if you were willing to see what God had in store from your current situaion? Even though life seems to stink, what if you were able to see why He has you in that place and were to allow Him to fulfill that purpose for His glory? Are there good things that have the potential to be accomplished, only because of the place that He has you in?

That’s alright for the single people I guess, but what about the people who are stuck at a dead end job? As rough as it is working at Tim Horton’s would you rather be a slave? Likely not. However, even in this circumstance, Paul tells slaves to remain as they were when the were called. “Are you a slave? Don’t let that worry you – but if you get a chance to be free, take it. And remember, if you were a slave when the Lord called you, you are now free in the Lord” 1Cor 7:21-22

Imagine, Paul tells the slaves not to be down just becaues they are slaves. He’s not condoning or promoting slavery; quite the opposite. In fact, he says that if you get the chance to be free, then take it. He would likely say the same things to you and I. If you feel stuck at a job that you don’t like, there is a truth that I want you to cling on to, if you belong to Christ, you are free.

I suppose for someone who doesn’t really belong to Jesus, that news is pretty depressing isn’t it? If you haven’t been called, you really aren’t free in any sense of the word whatsoever.

I don’t know if you know this or not, but I’m not particularily fulfilled at my job. Fixing cars really isn’t all that glamorous. It’s a means to an end. It allows me to provide for my family and support the true work that I have been sent to accomplish in the Lord.

If you haven’t been called, maybe you really are stuck. If that is you, I pray that you will both hear and receive the call. For those of you who have responded to the call of Christ, despite your relationship status or career, are you able to get any picture of why God might have you where He does? If so, are you willing to see this chapter in life through, even if it isn’t the chapter that you would have written for yourself?

There is one other thing that I am compelled to address. It really isn’t good to be alone. I will encourage you as I have before to seek out and cultivate Godly relationships. I know those kinds of relationships aren’t as fun as others, but the people who walk with you in the ways of the world really aren’t making it better. I wish I could be there for you more and for those of you who know me, I’ll give you what I can, but there is less of me available than there used to be. Fortunately, I’m not the only person in this world who knows Jesus.
Praise The Lord for that!

Love Kevin